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If you have just been served by a marshal, whether it was for a divorce, custody matter, restraining order, or something else, that means it’s time to take some action. What should you do?


  1. Contact a Lawyer. This is not a “go it alone” situation. While you can represent yourself if you choose to, you should at least consult with an attorney so that you know what the paperwork you have received means and what your options are.
  2. File an appearance. If you hire a lawyer, he or she will do that for you. However, if you are going to be a self-represented party, you will need to file your own appearance so that the court can contact you.
  3. Mark your calendar. You do actually need to show up for the court date. Ignoring it will not make the matter go away, so make sure you actually attend so that you can advocate for yourself, or request time to obtain an attorney.
  4. Prepare. Again, if you hire a lawyer, they will prepare you for your court date by speaking with you, obtaining documents, etc. If you choose to represent yourself, you should compile any potential evidence that you may need and organize your thoughts.
  5. Contact the opposing party (if appropriate). If the matter with which you were served is not a restraining order, you may want to contact the opposing party and see if anything can be worked out prior to court. Your attorney can do this with either the opposing party or opposing counsel, or, you can if you are self-represented.



While this article is not legal advice, the reader should consider it as a broad overview of options.  Ever argue with a woman? Call us today, and let us help you figure out your next steps.  Call us at 203.745.3151 or email us at


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