Dear Attorneys,
My spouse and I have decided to separate, but things at home have become really tense. I’m thinking about moving out for everyone’s sake, but a friend told me that if I leave the marital home, it could be considered “abandonment.” Is that true?
Sincerely,
New Home Bound
Dear New Home,
You’re not alone — this is one of the most common questions we receive from clients who are preparing for a separation or divorce. The short answer is no, moving out of the marital residence in Connecticut does not automatically mean that you’ve “abandoned” your spouse or given up your rights to the home. Let’s unpack that a bit.
Connecticut is a “no-fault” state when it comes to divorce, which means no one has to prove that one spouse did something “wrong” to end the marriage. “Abandonment” is technically one of the legal grounds available for divorce, but it’s rarely used and must meet specific criteria — such as showing that one spouse intentionally deserted the other for at least one year and without justification. Simply moving out to reduce conflict or for your own well-being does not usually meet that definition.
However, there are a few things to keep in mind before you pack up:
🏠 Property rights: You don’t lose your ownership interest in the marital home by moving out. But if you do leave, it’s smart to document the property’s condition and keep track of household contributions (like mortgage or utility payments).
👶 Children: If you have children, moving out can sometimes complicate parenting time arrangements in the short term. It’s important to discuss a temporary schedule or formalize a custody agreement as soon as possible.
💰 Finances: Continuing to contribute to household expenses (if possible) helps show that you’re acting responsibly, not abandoning your financial obligations. Additionally, you will likely be required to keep contributing to the residence in the same way that you were previously, in accordance with the Automatic Orders that are filed in a dissolution.
If the living situation has become unbearable, or even unsafe, you have every right to protect your peace. Just be strategic about it. Consult with an attorney before making a move so you can plan ahead for any financial, custody, or property implications. At Wolf & Shore Law Group, we guide clients through these tough transitions every day. Moving out may feel like a big step, but with the right advice, it can be the first step toward a better, calmer future.
Very Truly Yours,
Wolf & Shore Law Group
*The situations represented in our Dear Attorneys column are entirely fictional and any resemblance to a specific case is unintentional. We cannot, and will not, offer legal advice to anyone who is not a client. However, if you do have questions or concerns, you should contact an attorney at your convenience.